Tuesday, October 12, 2010

A heavy heart

Our dear friend, Todd, went to be with the Lord at 1:45 this morning. After his condition began deteriorating last week this was the outcome we expected, but it's still a shock. There had been no warnings, this was all so sudden. I feel I could just break down & sob at any moment, but, I think as a defense mechanism, I'm just not letting myself think about it yet. I have to take care of my kids & be on my game for work & I'm afraid if I let myself cry the way I want to that I won't be able to function.

It still hasn't completely set in. It feels so surreal. On Saturday we went to the hospital to see the family & visit. I went back to see Todd & say goodbye. He looked so peaceful & like he could wake up at any moment. Oh, how we'll all miss him.

Todd had a condition that put him in severe pain for years but he didn't complain about it. He was a man filled with joy. Everyone loved him, especially the kids. He grew up in Brazil & was able to go spend a couple months there this past summer. When Todd first saw Clay, our little boy wasn't smiling much, but he smiled right away when he saw Todd for the first time! That was just the affect that Todd had on those around him.

Under his "about me" section on his facebook page Todd had this quote by John Wesley:

"Do all the good you can by all the means you can in all the ways you can in all the places you can At all times you can To all the people you can as long as ever you can."

How very fitting & so very true for him.

I really do rejoice that Todd is now with his Savior & knowing how much pain he was in makes it that much more comforting knowing that he's no longer in pain. I'm just in disbelief that he's gone and my heart absolutely aches for his family. The funeral is Saturday, Ray's a pallbearer. I encourage you to go here to read a little about Todd & see how you can help his family.

To add to the emotional roller coaster, my great-grandfather passed away last week. My 90-year-old great-grandmother was handling it well & has been in a nursing home, recuperating from a surgery and about to go home; on Sunday she was being wheeled down a ramp when the nurses aid hit a bump and dumped my great-grandmother. She now is in the hospital in a great deal of pain and has a broken eye socket, nose and I forget what else.

The big thing that had been planned was Rach's little four-year-old, Ruthie, was scheduled for leg surgery. The right leg was operated on two weeks ago & the left leg was operated on yesterday. I felt that was emotional on it's own, I think everything else has just compounded the feeling. Praise the Lord the surgeries have gone well & she was recuperating well after the first surgery!

I ask for continued prayer for Todd's family. While we rejoice that Todd is with the Lord I know their loss is great & it will take time to adjust to this change in their lives.

And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away.
~ Revelation 21:4

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